Veggie Might: Make Your Own Mustard

Penned by the effervescent Leigh, Veggie Might is a weekly Thursday column about the wide world of Vegetarianism.

What do you do when you need a quick meal, have veggie dogs leftover from camping, but the only mustard is the fancy balsamic garlic mustard you picked up in at the New England Maple Museum in Vermont? (Oh, we’ll visit there again, CHG campers, don’t you worry.)

If you’re me, you wonder if you could make your own mustard out the beaucoup yellow powder taking over your spice cabinet. (Then you eat the veggie dog with the fancy mustard.) But it got me investigatin’.

I read up on mustard making at Mother Earth News, a blog called Montana Jones, and the trusty How to Cook Everything Vegetarian cookbook by Mark Bittman.

Turns out, you get pretty weak mustard from just adding water and vinegar to commercial mustard powder. But with only a touch more effort, you can get some sinus-clearingly fantastic mustard with yellow and brown mustard seeds.

Chow simplifies the mustard seed situation better than anyone, but here’s a quick breakdown:

• Yellow mustard seeds can vary in color from brownish yellow to white. Yellow mustard seeds are best known and most readily available to Americans.
• Brown mustard seeds are dark brown or black and easily found in spice shops and Indian groceries.
• Black mustard seeds also range from dark brown to black but are smaller, more pungent than the other two varieties, and primarily used in Indian cooking. Black mustard seeds will also confuse your enemies!

The making is simple: soak the mustard seeds in the water, vinegar, spice mix for a few hours to overnight, puree, and TADA! Mustard. The nuances are only slightly more complicated.

Mustard loses its power over time. If it’s too strong at first, let it sit a while—a few hours up to a week—before you serve. Store your homemade mustard in glass, ceramic, or even plastic containers. Mustard will ingest a metal container. Mmm….ore-y. Fresh ingredients will affect shelf life, but homemade mustard will keep for a couple of months or longer.

Whether you use a blender, food processor, or mortar and pestle, Mark Bittman warns you will not get commercial smoothness with home equipment. He’s right, as far as I can tell, but I like mine with a coarse texture.

I made two batches and let them sit overnight: one just straight-up the MB way, though I used garlic powder instead of fresh, and one with horseradish. Both were explosivo when I zapped them in the morning before work but had mellowed to perfection by lunchtime. My tofu sandwich rocked my socks.

Once you have the basic recipe down, you can be creative and experiment with spices and sweeteners. Soon you’ll be making your own fancy mustard and selling them at museums all across the northeast.

~~~

If you like this recipe, you might always like:

• Barefoot Contessa’s Barbecue Sauce 
• Golden Delight Egg Salad 
• Save Money on Seasonings: Make Your Own Mixes (MYOM)

~~~

Spicier Brown Mustard
Yields 8 oz, or approximately 24 teaspoons
Adapted from How to Cook Everything Vegetarian.
NOTE: Alas, Leigh’s camera perished in Lake George last week. This placeholder photo comes from Cookthink. It's a nice site, and you should visit there.

2 tablespoons yellow mustard seeds
2 tablespoons brown mustard seeds
1/4 cup apple cider vinegar
1/4 cup water
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
Generous pinch of salt

Horseradish Mustard
Yields 8 oz, or approximately 24 teaspoons

2 tablespoons yellow mustard seeds
2 tablespoons brown mustard seeds
1/4 cup apple cider vinegar
1/4 cup water
1/2-inch cube of fresh horseradish, chopped
Generous pinch of salt

Instructions are the same for each recipe.

1) Combine ingredients in a glass or ceramic container with a lid. Plastic is okay, but metal is a no-no.

2) Let stand overnight or at least 2–3 hours.

3) Puree in a blender or food processor until the desired consistency is reached. (I tried one batch in each and found the blender to have a slight edge on smoothness.) Add a drizzle of water to keep the blades whirling.

4) Pour back into glass container and let it mellow for a day or so.

5) Serve on your favorite sandwich or veggie dog and know spicy mustard.

Approximate Calories, Fat, Fiber, and Price per Serving
9.2 calories, 0.5g fat, 0.3g fiber, $0.02

Calculations (for horseradish version)
2 tbsp yellow mustard seeds: 104 calories, 6g fat, 4g fiber, $.19
2 tbsp brown mustard seeds: 104 calories, 6g fat, 4g fiber, $.19
1/4 cup apple cider vinegar: 12.5 calories, 0g fat, 0g fiber, $.04
1/2” cube of horseradish: negligible calories, fat, and fiber, $.07
[1/2 tsp garlic powder: negligible calories, fat, and fiber, $.02]
generous pinch of salt: negligible calories, fat, and fiber, $.02
TOTALS: 220 calories,12g fat, 8g fiber, $.51
PER SERVING (TOTALS/24): 9.2 calories, .5g fat, .3g fiber, $.02

Yellow Tomato Recipes, Part I: Salsa and Soup (Also, Encounters of the Celebrity Kind)

Before we get into our first two recipes from Wednesday’s Tomato-a-thon, I encourage you to check out this post over at The Onion’s AV Club. It’s all about the writers’ favorite/best celebrity encounters, and the comment section is hilarious. My favorite story is from the hopefully-not-aptly named Poodog:

I became enraged at a burrito place in Venice, CA in 2001 when friends began talking about Doogie Howser (one of my many high school nicknames) seemingly out of nowhere.

Me: F** you, I do not look like Doogie Howser!!!
Friend: Neil Patrick Harris is getting a Coke right behind you.
NPH (at me): Nice one.

To play along, my top three:

1) I met Britney Spears at the 1999 Grammy Nominations ceremony, at the very beginning of her career. It was unremarkable, except for this: girl is TINY. Like, if she’s 5-foot-1, I’d be shocked. She makes Prince look like Yao Ming.

2) A few months later, I got a phone call from Quincy Jones. My number was one digit away from our company president’s, and QJ mis-dialed. When you’re 21, there is nothin’ like coming back from lunch to hear, “Hello, Kristen. This is Quincy Jones,” all smooth-like and basso profundo on your voicemail. I kept it for months.

3) I’ve physically bumped into Yoko Ono twice, about four years apart, both times in Midtown. The first time, I remember thinking, “Oh no, I hope I didn’t hurt that older Asian lad- … holy moly, it’s Yoko Ono!” The second time, I remember thinking, “Oh no, I hope I didn’t hurt that older Asian lad- … is Yoko Ono following me?”

Runner-up: In college, I interviewed all of Parliament Funkadelic. It was bananas. George Clinton is like Buddha and Santa rolled into one patchouli-scented pile of awesome. Really nice guy. And naturally funky, of course.

Do you have any fun celebrity stories? Stick ‘em in the comment section. We’d love to hear. But before you go to there … our regularly scheduled post:

Wednesday! 39 Tomatoes, 11 Hours, No Mercy. Remember that? Oh, those were good times. It was bizarrely thrilling to use up all the produce, and the experience was an excellent confidence-builder for future abundances. (Watch your back, zucchini.) Plus, while all the recipes were intended to be healthy and inexpensive, the numbers were much better than I would have guessed. Everything came out to about $25, total, and each dish was less than 150 calories per serving.

*Dances*

Yellow Tomato Soup and Tomatillo & Yellow Tomato Salsa were two of the recipes (three more coming on Monday), and the soup, in particular, went over like gangbusters. It is HIGHLY suggested. With croutons, if you can

P.S. There were 40 tomatoes in the box, (I ate one the night we got them), making each piece $0.25. Rachel's CSA, I owe you one.

Tomatillo and Yellow Tomato Salsa
Adapted from Epicurious/Gourmet
Makes about 6 generous cups salsa, or 12 massive servings

2 tablespoons vegetable oil
6 tomatillos* (about 1/2 pound), husked, rinsed, and chopped fine
4 vine-ripened large yellow tomatoes or yellow bell peppers (or a mix of both), chopped fine
1 large onion, chopped fine
1 to 2 jalapeño chilies, minced (wear rubber gloves)
1/4 cup chopped fresh cilantro

1) In a small or medium bowl, mix  oil, tomatillos, tomatoes or bell peppers, onion, jalapeños, coriander, and salt to taste. Refrigerate 60 minutes to overnight. Eat!

Approximate Calories, Fat, Fiber, and Price Per Serving
45 calories, 2.9 g fat, 1 g fiber, $0.23

Calculations
2 tablespoons vegetable oil: 247 calories, 28 g fat, 0 g fiber, $0.18
6 tomatillos: 65 calories, 2 g fat, 3.9 g fiber, $0.92
4 vine-ripened large yellow tomatoes: 127 calories, 2.5 g fat, 5.9 g fiber, $1.00
1 large onion, chopped fine: 63 calories, 0.2 g fat, 2.1 g fiber, $0.15
1 to 2 jalapeño chilies: 32 calories, 0 g fat, 0 g fiber, $0.10
1/4 cup chopped fresh cilantro: 1 calorie, 0 g fat, 0.1 g fiber, $0.45
TOTAL: 535 calories, 34.7 g fat, 12 g fiber, $2.80
PER SERVING (TOTAL/12): 45 calories, 2.9 g fat, 1 g fiber, $0.23

~~~

Yellow Tomato Soup
Makes about 6 cups of soup
Adapted from Epicurious/Bon Appetit

1 large onion, chopped (about 2 1/2 cups)
6 bacon slices (about 5 ounces), chopped
5 cups chopped yellow tomatoes (about 2 pounds)
2 garlic cloves, minced
1/2 cup dry Sherry
1/2 cup dry white wine
4 cups chicken stock or canned low-salt chicken broth
2 teaspoons minced canned chipotle chilies*
1 tablespoon fresh chopped oregano leaves
1/4 cup 2% evaporated milk

NOTE: I doubled the batch when I made this soup, so my cooking times were much, much longer. They may be slightly longer here, too, so use your judgment. If it looks like the soup will be too thin when you puree it, let it reduce a while longer. Or, you might want to use less broth to begin with. Also, I found 2 teaspoons to be PLENTY of chipotle, but some Epicurious reviewers added even more. Go with your gut, and if you find it too spicy, add a tablespoon or two of sugar to cut the heat. - Kris

1) In a large pot or Dutch Oven, cook onion and bacon over medium heat, stirring occasionally, until onion is starting to brown up. Add tomatoes and garlic. Drop heat a little and simmer about 20 minutes, until tomatoes are nice and tender. Add Sherry and wine. Simmer 5 more minutes. Add stock. Simmer 15 minutes, or until you have about 1-1/2 quarts (6 or 7 cups) of soup. Add chipotles and oregano. Puree soup in a blender, working in 2 or 3 batches, taking care that your blender doesn't 'splode. Return to pot. Add evaporated milk. Stir. Heat through. Salt and pepper to taste.

Approximate Calories, Fat, Fiber, and Price Per Serving
123 calories, 4.1 g fat, 1.4 g fiber, $1.20

Calculations
1 large onion: 63 calories, 0.2 g fat, 2.1 g fiber, $0.15
6 bacon slices: 276 calories, 21.3 g fat, 0 g fiber, $1.66
5 cups chopped yellow tomatoes: 104 calories, 2.1 g fat, 4.9 g fiber, $0.75
2 garlic cloves, minced: 9 calories, 0 g fat, 0.1 g fiber, $0.10
1/2 cup dry Sherry: 68 calories, 0 g fat, 0 g fiber, $0.49
1/2 cup dry white wine: 96 calories, 0 g fat, 0 g fiber, $1.00
4 cups low-salt chicken broth: 67 calories, 0 g fiber, 0 g fat, $2.39
2 teaspoons minced canned chipotle chilies: 5 calories, 0.2 g fat, 0.3 g fiber, $0.20
1 tablespoon fresh chopped oregano leaves: negligible calories, fiber, and fat, $0.10
1/4 cup 2% evaporated milk: 50 calories, 1 g fat, 1 g fiber, $0.27
TOTAL: 738 calories, 24.8 g fat, 8.4 g fat, $7.21
PER SERVING (TOTAL/6): 123 calories, 4.1 g fat, 1.4 g fiber, $1.20

Tyler Florence’s Mojo Marinade (for Chicken, Carne Asada, etc.)

Hi everybody! I’m back, and catching up to everything I missed while I was away. Prodigious thanks to both Stan and Leigh, who covered during my absence.

While things are a little hectic right now, they should be up to speed soon. In the meantime, I give you Tyler Florence’s Mojo, a lively, tasty Tex-Mex-style marinade for chicken breast and flank steak. Alas, since it’s nearly impossible to account for how much oil the meat will retain, there are no nutritional calculations (though the price math is still listed).

If you’re hankering for a solid side dish, check out Avocado and Corn Salsa over at Serious Eats. I posted on it today, and can absolutely vouch for its over-the-moonness.

Until tomorrow...

Mojo Marinade
Makes about 1 1/4 cups
Adapted from Tyler Florence.
Note: photo is of marinated steak, and not the marinade itself. The meat just looked better.

4 garlic cloves, minced
1 jalapeno, minced
1 large handful fresh cilantro leaves, finely chopped
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
2 limes, juiced
1 orange, juiced
2 tablespoons white vinegar
1/2 cup olive oil

In a medium bowl, combine garlic, jalapeno, cilantro, salt, and pepper. Mash it all together to form a past. Add lime juice, orange juice, vinegar, and oil. Whisk to combine. Use as marinade or sauce.

Approximate Price of Marinade
$2.91

Calculations
4 garlic cloves, minced: $0.20
1 jalapeno, minced: $0.36
1 large handful fresh cilantro leaves, finely chopped: $0.45
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper: $0.03
2 limes, juiced: $0.40
1 orange, juiced: $0.50
2 tablespoons white vinegar: $0.06
1/2 cup olive oil: $0.91
TOTAL: $2.91

Grasslands Herb Salsa: Sweet Mongolia

In the past 20 months, we’ve featured recipes from India, Israel, Italy, and … well, many other countries beginning with the letter “I.” But it’s pretty rare we get to highlight food from outer Mongolia. Or rather: from a town located between Mongolia and Siberia called Manzhouli. (Thanks, Serious Eats!)

In olden days, we used “outer Mongolia” as a synonym for “very far away.” (Also see: Guam, Mars, East Bumble****.) Up until several hours ago, the only things I knew about the place is that it borders China, and my friend J was considering working on a Habitat for Humanity project there. (Which I’m fairly sure solicited a shocked “MONGOLIA?” from each and every person she told.)

But now, I’m a virtual expert. (Meaning: I looked at Wikipedia, which is a virtual reference guide in the computer sense.) For instance, did you know Mongolia has a Pegasus on its coat of arms? Or that it’s a parliamentary republic? Or that its national anthem is titled "Монгол улсын төрийн дуулал"? (Literally: “Welcome to Mongolia. Instead of Mints, You Will Find Mutton Jerky Under Your Hotel Pillow.”) Well, now you do.

Apparently, beyond noodles and awesome barbecue (which may or may not be an actual regional invention), Mongolians are also fond of roasted meats – especially goats and sheep. Turns out, they need the animal fat to survive the winters, which, being a total cold weather wussy, would cause me to perish in under 20 seconds.

This recipe, Grasslands Herb Salsa, is a topping for those roasted meats. It’s from a gorgeous cookbook called Beyond the Great Wall: Recipes and Travels in the Other China, which was nominated for a James Beard Award earlier this week.

Essentially, it's a simple cilantro-based salsa that’s entirely unimpressive on its own, but morphs into something highly delicious when applied to pan-cooked chicken breast. In fact, The Boyfriend and I have eaten chicken two of the last four nights, just for an excuse to use the salsa. There are about two tablespoons left, so he should expect chicken on Saturday night, too. Poor guy.

Should you decide to make it yourself … actually, there’s not much to know. It’s only 12 calories a serving, and it’s simple enough that a kindergartener could make it. Granted, it would have to be a kindergartener who’s accustomed to food processing, but you get the picture.

Anyway, happy weekend, sweet readers. Hope your days off are as cool as Mongolia. Cooler, even.

Grasslands Herb Salsa
Makes about 3/4 cup, or enough for six chicken filets
Adapted from Beyond the Great Wall: Recipes and Travels in the Other China

2 cups packed cilantro (a.k.a. coriander) leaves and stems
1/2 cup coarsely chopped scallions (white and tender green parts)
2 tablespoons rice vinegar
1/4 teaspoon salt, or to taste

1) In a food processor, puree herbs and scallions until they're a "coarse paste." Add vinegar and salt. Pulse. Salt and pepper to taste. (I needed a little more salt.)

2) Pour into a small bowl. Allow guests/family to spoon their own salsa on to their meat.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
12 calories, 0 g fat, $0.37

Calculations
2 cups packed cilantro (leaves and stems): 7 calories, 0.2 g fat, $1.50
1/2 cup coarsely chopped scallions (white and tender green parts): 16 calories, 0.1 g fat, $0.22
2 tablespoons rice vinegar: 50 calories, 0 g fat, $0.48
1/4 teaspoon salt, or to taste: negligible calories and fat, $0.01
TOTAL: 73 calories, 0.3 g fat, $2.21
PER SERVING (TOTAL/6): 12 calories, 0 g fat, $0.37

Veggie Might: Guacamole-Bean Dip Mashup/Saved by Guac and Roll

Penned by the effervescent Leigh, Veggie Might is a weekly Thursday column about the wide world of Vegetarianism.

As is the case with many over hyped New York events, I’ve chosen to ignore the Manhattan arrival of a highly anticipated grocery store for about 3 years. (I’ll stand shoulder-to-shoulder with my cohort for peace and for rock, but not for soymilk.)

I figured the lines would be shorter by now, so I decided to brave it. Mostly right, on a late-evening Wednesday, the haul was worth the crowd: super-cheap fake bacon, spicy almonds, and a bag of 4 gorgeous avocados for $3.49. Sweet.

Bright green and firm, the avocadoes needed a couple of days to ripen to perfection. Sunday afternoon, they were ready.

The avocado seemed the perfect complement to a faux bacon sandwich at a time when tomatoes are so disappointingly out of season. Mmm...guacamole, I thought. Then I recalled a recipe that I’d always wanted to try from my Weight Watchers days.

As best I could remember, the recipe simply combined white beans and avocado to lighten the caloric/fat load of guacamole. Essentially, it’s a bean dip and guacamole mashup. As my coworker, T, put it, “like squirting out a taco.” Exactly.

Oh baby. 1 can of beans + 1-1/2 avocadoes + my 5 borough famous guacamole recipe = music in my mouth10.

Avocados and beans make a logical combination—the flavors make magic together—but the cannellini beans are mild enough that the avocado is still the star. Not to mention that it steals the nutritional show too, helping lower cholesterol and aiding the absorption of carotenoids.

Of course, the beans are no useless hangers on or triangle players. High in fiber and protein, they also kick it in the folate and manganese arenas.

You can tweak the spices to suit this recipe your taste. I love garlic and lots of cilantro in my guacamole, so I’m heavy handed with both. I would have included tomatoes, but they are too pink this time of year.

I’ve been using this as sandwich spread all week—mostly with faux bacon and salad greens on toast—and, of course, it is a new classic with tortilla chips.

Crank up the tunes, invite a few people over, and set out this bowl of tasty, healthy guacamole tribute. You will have fans like never before.

Guacamole-Bean Dip Mashup
Yields sixteen 2-tbsp servings


1 15 oz can cannellini beans, well rinsed
1 1/2 ripe avocado
1–3 cloves garlic
1/2 large onion, quartered
3 tbsp lime juice
1 tsp salt
1 cup cilantro, chopped
1 cup tomato, chopped (optional)
black pepper to taste
cayenne pepper to taste

1) In a food processor, combine beans and 1 avocado until smooth. (You can also do this with a bowl and a fork.) Set aside the 1/2 avocado.

2) Add garlic clove(s), onion, lime juice, and salt. Pulse until onion is diced.

3) Transfer to a medium bowl. Add remaining 1/2 avocado and mix with a fork. This will give you a chunky texture. If that’s not important to you, skip this step and put all the in avocado in at step 1.

4) Mix in cilantro. Add peppers to taste.

5) Dig.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price per Serving
60 calories, 3g fat, $.20

Calculations
1 15 oz can cannellini beans: 330 calories, 3g fat, $.79
1 1/2 ripe avocado: 483 calories, 43.5g fat, $1.30
3 cloves garlic: 12.6 calories, 0g fat, $.04
1/2 large onion: 35 calories, .2g fat, $.45
3 tbsp lime juice: 12 calories, .03 fat, $0.15
1 tsp salt: negligible calories and fat, $.02
1 cup cilantro: 22 calories, 0g fat, $.39
black pepper to taste: negligible calories and fat, $.02
cayenne pepper to taste: negligible calories and fat, $.02
Totals: 894.6 calories, 46.73g fat, $3.18
Per serving: 60 calories, 3g fat, $.20

(Additional photo courtesy of Flickr member Perfecto Insecto.)

Shaksouka? I Barely Even Know Ya! (Sorry.)

It’s snowing like mad outside, the office is unusually quiet, and A Charlie Brown Christmas is playing quietly on my cubicle computer. In a way, this is the holidays in all Big Apple workplaces: peacefully festive, with a tinge of melancholy. Or, maybe everyone’s just hung over from last night’s Christmas party. Take your pick.

Like every other place in America, it’s been slightly-to-mostly insane over here lately, what with card sending, gift shopping, tinsel hanging, funeral attending, and getting papers/projects/life in order for the ever-approaching New Year. There haven’t been many hours left for cooking, either, save for today’s dish, Shaksouka, and a botched attempt at quesadillas on Wednesday night. (On a related note: what kind of adult messes up a quesadilla? First graders are taught to make them before they’re taught to add.)

Anyway, about the Shaksouka: it’s an Israeli dish that’s tasty, incredibly inexpensive, relatively healthy, and (for all you secret six-year-olds out there) really, really fun to eat. Essentially eggs poached in a subtly spicy tomato sauce, the idea is to spoon a helping into a bowl, and then sop it up with a big hunk of thick, crusty bread. And if you can keep the sauce off your pants … bonus.

I made two alterations to the original Serious Eats recipe, which called for fresh oregano (I used 3/4 teaspoon of the dried stuff), and a 28-oz. can of crushed tomatoes (I pulsed a can of whole tomatoes five times in mah food processor for a fresher taste). Both changes worked beautifully, and The Boyfriend and I even have a cup of leftover tomato sauce for future pasta dishes. (Note to leftovers fiends: the eggs themselves probably won't keep very well, so I'd eat them a.s.a.p.)

Oh, and last thing – I didn’t have to go shopping for any of the ingredients in this dish. They were all already in the pantry, which is the culinary equivalent of discovering a forgotten $20 bill in your pants pocket. Pretty sweet, if you ask me.

P.S. Calculations are for four servings, though the picture only depicts two portions.

Shaksouka (or Shakshouka) (or Eggs Poached in Tomato Sauce)
Serves 2 to 4
Adapted from Serious Eats.

1 tablespoon olive oil
1 small onion, diced small
3 cloves garlic, roughly chopped
1 (28-ounce) can crushed tomatoes or 1 (28-ounce) can whole peeled tomatoes pulsed a few times
2 teaspoons ground cumin
1 teaspoon ground coriander
1/2 teaspoon paprika
3/4 teaspoon dried oregano
1/2 cup water
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
4 - 8 eggs

1) In a large skillet or saute pan, heat oil over medium heat. Add onions and garlic. Cook 5 minutes, until onions are kind of soft, stirring occasionally. Add tomatoes, cumin, coriander, paprika, oregano and water. Stir. Salt and pepper to taste. Jack heat up to high. When sauce comes to a boil, drop heat back to medium-low, cover, and cook 25 minutes, stirring occasionally.

2) Carefully crack eggs into sauce so they're evenly spaced. Re-cover skillet. Cook 5 minutes until eggs are just the way you like 'em. DO NOT STIR.

3) Carefully scoop eggs and a bunch of sauce into bowls. Serve with bread for some good times.

Note from Tara the original Serious Eats author: "Alternatively, if you are preparing up to 8 eggs and your pan isn’t wide enough to accommodate all of the eggs at once, poach them separately in water and add them to the sauce to serve."

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
252 calories, 13.9 g fat, $1.04

Calculations
1 tablespoon olive oil: 119 calories, 13.5 g fat, $0.12
1 small onion: 29 calories, 0.1 g fat, $0.16
3 cloves garlic: 13 calories, 0 g fat, $0.12
1 (28-ounce) can chunky crushed tomatoes (or “chef’s cut”): 254 calories, 2.2 g fat, $2.00
2 teaspoons ground cumin: negligible calories and fat, $0.03
1 teaspoon ground coriander: negligible calories and fat, $0.13
1/2 teaspoon paprika: 3 calories, 0.1 g fat, $0.02
3/4 teaspoon oregano: 2 calories, 0 g fat, $0.03
1/2 cup water: negligible calories and fat, FREE
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper: negligible calories and fat, $0.02
8 eggs: 588 calories, 39.8 g fat, $1.53
TOTAL: 1008 calories, 55.7 g fat, $4.16
PER SERVING: 252 calories, 13.9 g fat, $1.04

Lollappleooza 2008: Spiced Slow Cooker Applesauce

(Hey you guys! I posted about Eggplant in Spicy Tomato Sauce over at Serious Eats today. It's inexpensive, healthy, and incredibly tasty, so check it out if you get the chance.)

Last year around this time, CHG ran a week-long cooking series called Lollappleooza, during which I posted four or five apple-based recipes, as well as an extensive post on the fruit’s many uses. The idea was spawned by a trip to a Pick Your Own farm, where The Boyfriend and I grabbed enough apples to sink a cruise liner. (And, to our great credit, we didn’t throw any at passing cars.)

This year, we opted to visit Long Island’s biggest corn maze instead of going apple-picking. (Because we're 12.) So, much like its namesake music festival, Lollappleooza has been reduced to a single day. And that day? Is today! (Whee!)

Last night, we had Curried Pork With Apples, a recipe I found on the ever-so-lovely Casual Kitchen. (Look for a larger article soon on Serious Eats.) The Boyfriend’s parents are staying with us, and we scarfed it along with some brown rice, and then had apple crisp and Ben & Jerry’s Cake Batter ice cream for dessert. (Side note: I realize this is as healthy/frugal cooking blog, but exceptions have to be made. So … GO GET THAT ICE CREAM RIGHT NOW. It tastes like an all-natural version of a fake food that’s trying to mimic a baked-from-scratch cake. And it is as TOTALLY DELICIOUS as that description is confusing.)

I also made AllRecipes' Spiced Slow Cooker Applesauce for later in the week. As a rule, most applesauce is ridiculously, brain-numbingly easy to make, and this is no exception. Yes, it takes seven hours to cook, but beyond that, it’s basically:

• peel apples
• dump in slow cooker
• add water
• cook
• add more stuff
• cook
• eat

Not too bad for the results, which are warm and sweet and fruity and all those other good words you associate with autumnal food. (Except maybe "squash-like" and "turkey-esque." It is neither of those.)

As always, there are a few notes if you decide to make the sauce yourself:

1) It’s on the sweet side. Cut a ¼ cup of brown sugar if you’re not crazy about tooth decay.

2) I had very, very small apples, so I ended up using ten instead of eight.

3) My apples were clearly labeled $1.99 for 3 lbs. I didn’t realize until I got home that the store had charged me $3.99. For the sake of my sanity, the calculations reflect the correct $1.99 price.

4) The nutrition numbers are provided by AllRecipes, so only the price is figured out below.

Happy Lollappleooza 2008!

Spiced Slow Cooker Applesauce
Makes about 2-2/3 cups of sauce
Adapted from All Recipes.

8 or 10 apples - peeled, cored, and thinly sliced (about 5 cups)
1/2 cup water
1/2 to 3/4 cup packed brown sugar
1/2 teaspoon pumpkin pie spice

1) Add apples and water to slow cooker. Turn to LOW and cook betwen 6 and 8 hours. Add sugar and pumpkin pie spice. Stir to combine. Cook 30 additional minutes.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
159 calories, 0.5 g fat, $0.25

Calculations
8 apples - peeled, cored, and thinly sliced (about 5 cups): $1.32
1/2 cup water: negligible calories and fat, $0.00
3/4 cup packed brown sugar: $0.34
1/2 teaspoon pumpkin pie spice: $0.35
TOTAL: $2.01
PER SERVING (TOTAL/8): 159 calories, 0.5 g fat, $0.25

Tzatziki Poetry Corner (Plus a Tzatziki Recipe)

Today, I will be expressing my feelings for Kalyn’s Kitchen’s tzatziki entirely in haiku.

Tzatziki, so cold.
With cucumber and lemon.
Good on all food, yo.

Goes with souvlaki,
pita, gyros, cereal.
'kay, not that last one.

Sweet tzatziki,
exceedingly hard to spell.
Must look up online.

Versatility
is thy name, low-fat yogurt.
My stomach, it smiles.

Dill weed, finally,
I have found a use for you.
You spoil so quickly.

Ate it all this week.
Boyfriend asks for other dip.
I say “tough cookies.”

Please, dearest readers.
Excuse my photography.
I suck at pictures.

And that’s it for this week’s edition of Poetry Corner. Yet, before we adjourn to our recipe, a few notes:

1) Here’s something I learned: 3 cups of regular low-fat yogurt, when drained, will turn into 2 cups of regular low-fat yogurt, making it probably not as low-fat as originally intended. That said, this dip is still ridiculously healthy and really, really good. See directions below for straining.

2) Kalyn asks for (unstrained) Greek yogurt in the recipe, which I fully endorse. If you can swing it, go crazy.

3) Kalyn’s original recipe asks you to puree the cucumbers with the dill mixture. I prefer a chunkier dip, so I only pulsed it. However, this is totally open to interpretation.

4) I like Kalyn’s site bunches, and will be returning for more food in the future.

And so we conclude
another Friday recipe.
Have good weekends, folks.

Tzatziki (Greek Yogurt and Cucumber Sauce)
Makes 8 servings of about 1/3 cup each
Adapted from Kalyn’s Kitchen.

3 cups low-fat plain yogurt, strained
Juice of one lemon (about 3 T)
1 garlic clove, chopped
2 medium cucumbers, peeled
About 1 T kosher salt for salting cucumbers
1 T finely chopped fresh dill (can substitute mint leaves for a slightly different version)
Kosher salt and fresh ground black pepper to taste

1) To strain the yogurt, stack two paper towels in a colander and place it in the sink. Place yogurt in paper towels. Leave for at least 2 hours. (I did it for 3 hours.) When finished, pour yogurt into a medium bowl.

2) Slice cucumbers in half lengthwise. Scoop out seeds with a teaspoon or melon baller. Dice cucumbers. Add them to a colander. Sprinkle chunks with 1 tablespoon salt. Walk away for 30 minutes while water seeps out of cucumbers. When time is up, drain and "wipe dry with paper towel."

3) Add cucumbers, garlic, lemon juice, dill, and black pepper to a food processor. Pulse a few times, until blended but still chunky. Pour cucumber mixture into yogurt. Stir thoroughly to combine. Salt and pepper to taste. (Try it first.)

4) Refrigerate for minimum 2 hours "so flavors can blend." DO NOT SKIP THIS STEP.

According to Kalyn: "This will keep for a few days or more in the refrigerator, but you will need to drain off any water and stir each time you use it."

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
57 calories, 8 g fat, $0.45

Calculations
3 cups low-fat plain yogurt: 390 calories, 7.5 g fat, $1.79
Juice of one lemon: 12 calories, 0 g fat, $0.33
1 garlic clove: 4 calories, 0 g fat, $0.05
2 medium cucumbers: 48 calories, 0.6 g fat $1.00
About 1 T kosher salt: negligible calories and fat, $0.03
1 T fresh dill: negligible calories and fat, $0.36
Kosher salt and fresh ground black pepper to taste: negligible calories and fat, $0.02
TOTAL: 454 calories, 8.1 g fat, $3.58
PER SERVING (TOTAL/8): 57 calories, 8 g fat, $0.45

Barefoot Contessa's Barbecue Sauce: Gettin' Potlucky

Every coupla weeks, I get together with a group of lovely ladies (including Veggie Might’s own Leigh) for a themed potluck dinner. It’s not your everyday, run-of-the-mill potluck, though. For one, there’s usually copious amounts of beer. For another. everybody gets completely freakin’ nuts with their creations. Nearly all of us are enthusiastic cooks, and it’s a rare chance to go crazy for a non-holiday occasion. We’ve had Mediterranean, Tailgate, and Vegetarian Nights so far, and I don’t think there’s been a dud dish in the group. Plus? THERE’S SO. MUCH. FOOD. By the end of each eve, we’re all like that “KILL ME” scene in Aliens, except our chests are bursting with meats and cheeses instead of hideous HR Giger monsters.

A different chick hosts the potluck each month, and Saturday, it went down at Casa el CHG in lovely Brooklyn, New York. Since our 109-year-old apartment building has a small backyard equipped with a medium-sized Thermos barbecue, a Grill Night theme seemed like the logical choice. So, the ladies (and their respective SOs) came over at 4pm, and we got busy applying some fire to some foodstuff. Seven hours later and EIGHTEEN dishes later, we finally stopped eating. It was heavenly.

The menu looked something like this:

A: Mango Gazpacho and Sugar Cookie S’mores
C: Swordfish, Scallop, and Vegetable Skewers with Lemon-Olive Oil Marinade
J: Grilled Honeysuckle Pineapple and Grilled Peaches with Honey Nut Cream Cheese & Honey
Kris: Fresh Lemonade, Cantaloupe with Prosciutto, and Grilled Flatbread with Eggplant, Gorgonzola, & Prosciutto OR Zucchini, Red Onion, Goat Cheese, & Parmesan
Leigh: Potato Salad and Tempeh Skewers with Peanut Dipping Sauce
M: Barbecue Chicken, and Grilled Corn with Parmesan & Butter
R: Tri-Tip Steak with Cherry Tomato Salsa
S: Taco Dip

A’s husband A also made a sweet corn dish called Tomalito (delicious), and our manfriend B brought along some sweet, spicy Betty Crocker Guacamole. The weather was unusually non-humid, and to top it all off, THERE WERE TWO PUPPIES. (Well, one puppy and one truly adorable Snack. [Who is Leigh's dog, not an actual snack.]) Really, the whole shebang was perfect. I’m aglow. (And still stuffed, 37 hours later.)

One of the (many, many) highlights of this round was M’s chicken, slathered in Barefoot Contessa’s Barbecue Sauce. Ina’s recipes inevitably make one or two appearances each potluck, and they’re generally met with oohs, aaahs, and lots of satisfied burping. Her BBQ concoction was no different. Several other bloggers have raved about it before, and - woof - right on the money. There’s this initial sweetness followed by an unexpected heat, and it’s better than any jarred stuff I’ve ever had. What’s more, BC’s recipe makes a staggering 1-1/2 quarts (48 oz) of sauce, which compensates for the initial investment. Without exaggeration, it will last FOR MONTHS.

One caveat, though: to be totally honest, thanks to a few calorie-packed ingredients (including a half-cup of vegetable oil), it’s not exactly a light sauce compared to most supermarket brands. Nor is it a particularly cheap one. One ounce has about 30 more calories than the average KC Masterpiece or Bullseye and, depending on your local grocery prices, will probably cost more, too. BUT. (But but but.) Great googly moogly, I promise the taste will make up for it. And remember - this is universal sauce. It can be applied to much more than chicken.

So, thanks to M, thanks to the potluck ladies, and be on the lookout later this week for another faboo potluck recipe (hopefully J's pineapple, which ... oh my).

Barbecue Sauce
Makes 48 ounces of sauce
Adapted from Ina Garten.

1 1/2 cups chopped yellow onion (1 large onion)
1 tablespoon minced garlic (3 cloves)
1/2 cup vegetable oil
1 cup tomato paste (10 ounces)
1 cup cider vinegar
1 cup honey
1/2 cup Worcestershire sauce
1 cup Dijon mustard
1/2 cup soy sauce
1 cup hoisin sauce
2 tablespoons chili powder
1 tablespoon ground cumin
1/2 tablespoon crushed red pepper flakes

1) In a large saucepan or Dutch oven, heat vegetable oil over low heat. Add onions and garlic. Cook 10 to 15 minutes, stirring occasionally. Onions should be softer and translucent when done, "but not browned."

2) Add all remaining ingredients to pot. Cook/simmer 30 minutes. Serve or keep in fridge.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
73 calories, 2.6 g fat, $0.21 per ounce

Calculations
1 1/2 cups chopped yellow onion (1 large onion): 63 calories, 0.1 g fat, $0.71
1 tablespoon minced garlic (3 cloves): 13 calories, 0 g fat, $0.10
1/2 cup vegetable oil: 970 calories, 109.7 g fat, $0.48
1 cup tomato paste (10 ounces): 233 calories, 1.3 g fat, $1.00
1 cup cider vinegar: 50 calories, 0 g fat, $0.21
1 cup honey: 1031 calories, 0 g fat, $1.44
1/2 cup Worcestershire sauce: 227 calories, 0 g fat, $1.20
1 cup Dijon mustard: 240 calories, 0 g fat, $2.13
1/2 cup soy sauce: 68 calories, 0.1 g fat, $0.76
1 cup hoisin sauce: 563 calories, 8.7 g fat,
2 tablespoons chili powder: 49 calories, 2.6 g fat, $0.09
1 tablespoon ground cumin: negligible calories and fat, $0.03
1/2 tablespoon crushed red pepper flakes: negligible calories and fat, $0.30
TOTAL: 3507 calories, 122.5 g fat, $10.33
PER SERVING (TOTAL/48): 73 calories, 2.6 g fat, $0.21

Summer Cooking: 60 Cheap, Healthy Marinades

The New York heat wave finally broke last night. Hot’s hot the world over, but if you’ve ever waited 20 minutes on a stinky 110°F subway platform, you know Big Apple summers are a special kind of hell. Apartments bake, blacktop wavers with steam, and even the local muggers are all like, “Forget wallets. I’m heisting a Slurpee.” Really, it’s like living on the sun.

When high temps roll around, the very last thing any right-thinking Brooklynite wants to do is increase the thermometer reading. Unfortunately, that rules out a lot of oven-oriented cooking. Baking, raising, roasting, and broasting (I just made that up) go out the window. So, how does one make up for the lost deliciousness?

The answer, my friends, is marinades.

Though tasty year-round, marinades have a special place in summer, when they impart mad, quick-cooking flavor without the risk of heatstroke. Even better, they’re inexpensive and relatively easy to keep light, as long as you avoid recipes that call for cups upon cups of olive oil.

Now, I can’t possibly explain why and how to marinate any better than Martha Stewart (see here, here, and here), but I can make a big, fat list full of recipe ideas. In fact, 60 of ‘em (recipes, not individual lists) are attached below. And just so you know, each marinade had to be:

Relatively inexpensive. Meaning no truffle oil, rare champagne, or crushed golden snail shells.

Low in fat. With some exceptions, these include no more than two tablespoons of oil, butter, or other high-fat ingredient. This criteria eliminated a lot of recipes like Ten Clove Garlic Marinade, which contains a staggering 2/3rd cup of EVOO. (Crap. Did I just write “EVOO”? Rachael Ray, GET OUT OF MY MIND.)

Almost all-natural. Very few processed ingredients allowed. This rules out a lot of dunk-a-chicken-breast-in-a-pint-of-Italian-dressing recipes, as well as bottled marinades like Mrs. Dash. Home-assembled marinades can be slightly more expensive than store bought, but you benefit by avoiding ingredient lists like this, courtesy of Lawry’s Sesame Ginger with Mandarin Orange Juice variety:

High Fructose Corn Syrup, Mandarin Orange Juice from Concentrate, Soy Sauce (Water, Wheat, Soybeans, Salt, Sodium Benzoate [Preservative]), Salt, Distilled Vinegar, Water, Modified Food Starch, Sesame Oil, Sesame Seeds, Yeast Extract, Garlic Powder, Caramel Color, Ginger, Xanthan Gum (for Consistency), Sesame Flavor, Citric Acid, Chili Pepper, Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate (Preservatives) and Natural Flavor.

Well-received. With the exception of the Real Simple and Martha Stewart/Everyday Food recipes, everything listed here received at least four stars (or 80% “yay!”) by reviewers.

I’ve never tried any of these, so please use your judgment when experimenting. Oh, and remember – if you can’t take the heat, stay out of the kitchen move to a slightly cooler part of the kitchen, where you can mix all this together without sweating your face off.

ASIAN STYLE MARINADES
All Recipes: Easiest Teriyaki Marinade Ever
All Recipes: Korean BBQ Chicken Marinade
All Recipes: Korean Marinade
All Recipes: Soy and Ginger Marinade
All Recipes: Teriyaki Sauce and Marinade
Cooking Light: Grilled Eggplant with Sesame Marinade
Eating Well: Five-Spice Marinade
Epicurious: Beer Teriyaki Marinade
Epicurious: Ginger-Chile Marinade
Epicurious: Hoisin Marinade
Epicurious: Korean Barbecue Beef, Marinade 1
Epicurious: Spicy Asian Marinade
Martha Stewart/Everyday Food: Indian Marinade (scroll down)
Martha Stewart/Everyday Food: Thai Marinade (scroll down)
Real Simple: Ginger-Sesame Marinade
Recipe Zaar: Walt’s Teriyaki Marinade

CITRUS MARINADES
Cooking Light: Jalapeño-Lime Marinade
Eating Well: Mojito Marinade
Recipe Zaar: Citrus Marinade
Southern Living: Citrus Marinade

FAJITA MARINADES
All Recipes: Beef Fajita Marinade
All Recipes: Chicken Fajita Marinade
All Recipes: Fajita Marinade 1
All Recipes: Super Fajita Marinade
Juan-Carlos Cruz: Tequila Steak Fajita

HERB AND SPICE MARINADES
Cooking Light: Browned Garlic and Burgundy Marinade
Cooking Light: Lemon Herb Marinade
Cooking Light: Zesty Dijon Marinade
Eating Well: Mustard, Rosemary, and Apple Marinade
Eating Well: Rosemary Red Wine Marinade
Epicurious: Minted Turkish Delight Marinade
Martha Stewart/Everyday Food: Herb and Garlic Marinade
Martha Stewart/Everyday Food: Maple Dijon Marinade
Martha Stewart/Everyday Food: Rosemary Balsamic Marinade
Martha Stewart/Everyday Food: Thyme, Shallot, and Lemon Marinade

MEATY MARINADES
All Recipes: G’s Flank Steak Marinade
Cooking Light: Orange-Maple Marinated Pork Loin
Ellie Krieger: Marinated Lamb Chops
Epicurious: Flank Steak Marinade
Epicurious: Ginger-Marinated Pork Tenderloin
Epicurious: Grilled Marinated London Broil
Martha Stewart/Everyday Food: Chipotle Marinade (for Pork Tenderloin)
Martha Stewart/Everyday Food: Citrus Marinade (for Pork Chops)
Martha Stewart/Everyday Food: Strip Steak Marinade
Recipe Zaar: Bahama Mama Chicken Marinade
Recipe Zaar: Honey Lime Chicken
Recipe Zaar: Pork Marinade
Recipe Zaar: Steak Marinade, Quick and Easy
Recipe Zaar: Super Simple Lamb Marinade

MISCELLANEOUS MARINADE
About.com: Balsamic Glaze Marinade
All Recipes: Absolutely Ultimate Marinade
All Recipes: Beer and Brown Sugar Steak Marinade
All Recipes: A Catering Company’s Marinade
Cooking Light: Ginger Molasses Marinade
Eating Well: Pirate Marinade
Eating Well: Red Wine Marinade
Food Network: Marinated Melon
Martha Stewart/Everyday Food: Buttermilk Marinade (scroll down)
Martha Stewart/Everyday Food: Spiced-Yogurt Marinade
Real Simple: End-of-Summer Marinade

(Photos courtesy of Flickr members minimallyinvasivenj and xander76.)

What Would You Do: Restaurant Gives Meat to Vegetarian (Also, There's a Mango Salsa Recipe in Here Somewhere)

(Apologies for the longest, most nonsensical post title, ever. Must ... work ... on ... brevity.)

We had a strange situation this weekend, and I’d love to solicit a few opinions from everybody. It’s definitely more of an etiquette dealie, but frugality and good business sense definitely factor in. I’m just not sure what we should have done.

Here’s the scenario: Saturday night, some friends were in from out of town and we all met up at a fancy Italian restaurant. The place was gorgeous, the wine was tasty, and all seemed well at first. When our time came to order, my friend H, a vegetarian since she was 13, specifically asked if the Potato Leek Soup was made with vegetable stock. The waiter, without checking, said, “yes.”

Can you guess what comes next?

Two or three bites into the soup, H pushed it away and grumbled, “Oh yeah, that’s chicken stock.” Three of us took a whiff, and – oooo, yup - no doubt about it. When the waiter swung by to check on us, H (not cruelly, but pointedly) expressed her displeasure and asked him to check with the chef.

Five minutes later: “Yes, it’s chicken broth. The recipe was changed,” he shot off, not quite apologetically. (Defensively, maybe? Even snobbily?)

H was unhappy (to say the least) and requested that the soup be cut from the bill. The rest of the night proceeded without incident until we received the ($300+) check, which (naturally) included the soup. We specifically had to ask for a new bill with the offending item removed.

Now … what would you have done? I think we should have asked to have her entire meal comped, and the restaurant should have bent over backwards to accommodate us for the rest of the night. While feeding meat to a vegetarian (probably) isn’t deadly, it’s … not good. What if she was Hindu, and it was beef broth? Or what if she had a peanut allergy? All in all, I think we handled it gracefully, but I wouldn’t have blamed H if she had lobbed a fork at somebody’s groin. We’re absolutely not going back, ever.

Oy.

And with that aside – it’s today’s food! I’ve made mango salsa quite a few times, and stunningly, prefer Weight Watchers’ recipe to all others. Of course, there are some things to know:

1) It's insanely flexible, meaning it can be spread on chicken breast, scooped with tortilla chips, mixed with rice, or substituted for body wash in your next shower. (Note: one of those may be false.)

2) It's not a watery salsa, and there are no tomatoes involved. You might want to warn friends/family accordingly.

3) I like it better after it sits for a night, but there's no problem eating it right after assembly.

4) The whole shebang will be significantly cheaper in a month or so, when both red bell peppers and mangos are fully in season. (I couldn’t wait.)

5) For you WW acolytes out there, it’s either 1 or 2 points a serving. Bonus!

6) There is a lot of chopping. Watch your fingers. (Gazes sadly at cuticle of left pointer finger, which has finally stopped bleeding.)

Hope y'all enjoy it, and again - would love to hear your opinions on the restaurant issue. Bring it!

Weight Watchers Mango Salsa
Makes 4 2/3rd cup servings

1/8th t. black pepper
1/8th t. salt
1 ½ T. fresh lime juice
2 medium mangos, chopped small
1 medium red bell pepper, diced
½ red onion, diced
½ jalapeno, diced
1 T. fresh cilantro

1) Combine all ingredients in a bowl and stir. Season with salt and pepper to taste.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
90 calories, 0.4 g fat, $1.01

Calculations
1/8th t. black pepper: negligible calories and fat, $0.01
1/8th t. salt: negligible calories and fat, $0.01
1 ½ T. fresh lime juice: 14 calories, 0 g fat, $0.24
2 medium mangos: 269 calories, 1.1 g fat $1.98
1 medium red bell pepper: 31 calories, 0.4 g fat, $1.19
½ red onion, diced: 35 calories, 0 g fat, $0.31
½ jalapeno, diced: 9 calories, 0 g fat, $0.03
1 T. fresh cilantro: negligible calories and fat, $0.25
TOTAL: 358 calories, 1.5 g fat, $4.02
PER SERVING (TOTAL/4): 90 calories, 0.4 g fat, $1.01

(Additional photo from bobnewell.net.)